Nyheter

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17.11.2005
Good feminine intentions

- Who is playing offside today?

- It is not a position my dear, nobody is actually playing it.

- So this player was really good because he got it?

- No, it is not good, we talked about this at home, remember? If the cookie jar receives the ball higher than brown sauce, it is a free kick to the other team.

- Oh, okay then. Go on Palace! We are the red ones, aren’t we?

- Come on babe, you know we even have this “red and blue army” -flag in our kitchen.

- I’m just checking I don’t cheer at wrong time. It’s lovely how colourful it is here at the stadium. And look at that little kid, he is singing and holding his dear scarf, so cute. Oh, I got to call Mindy.

- Come on, it’s a game on here.

- Hi babes, I’m in a football game…Crystal Palace against something... Yeah it’s great… could we go shopping tomorrow? Oh my God, somebody just got kicked, I’ll call you back later.

- You cheat! You are useless peace of crap! (He shouts to the pitch)

- Stop it! (She looks around bit embarrassed of him)

- Booo!! (The whole stadium boos)

- Ohh, I hope he didn’t get hurt, why did this other player kick him like that, that is so mean.

- Come on that was a clean tackle.

- I don’t like that player, he is too aggressive. I like the smaller one, they shouldn’t push him like that. And why are all these people booing at him? So cruel.

- He is a diver, he cheats because he can’t handle the men’s game. (He says bit heated because Palace player gets a yellow card)

- You all have too much testosterone. Can he keep the card?

- No, you don’t actually get to keep the card, they just show it to you… Why am I even doing this. You know, I’d really like to just watch the game, it sort of ruins the atmosphere to try to explain it to you all the time.

- I was just asking, no need to take it on me. (She is bit upset and decides to call Mindy back)

- No…it’s still love-love…oh okay, nil-nil then… Which one… Italian… There, wow, he is well fit, thanks for the tip, I’ll call you later.

- That is so girly. You only come to look men, you don’t care about the game.

- That is so unfair, I like watching football, I love Crystal Palace.

- So name one of our players.

- Obviously the Italian one but also we have the striker, the small one, AJ something.

- Yeah, you don’t even know that he plays for England.

- So he doesn’t play for Palace then?

- This is what I mean, your football knowledge is limited to players you think are cute. You don’t look at the ugly ones, like Riihilahti, even when he has the ball.

- What’s wrong with that, you always watch women tennis as well.

- But that’s different. I just happen to appreciate how good Russian women players are. But your friend Mindy for example, she goes with full make-up on to show herself to the games for maybe to become a footballer’s wife one day. (Sudden silence in the whole stadium because the away team scores)

- Damn! Those lucky bastards!

- What happened?

- They just scored.

- But that is nice, I’m happy someone got a goal.

- What are you talking about, we are down, our players are useless!

- Oooh, look at the poor little fellow being all down. (She sees the little boy with the scarf really upset)

- His team, our pride, is losing, of course he is sad.

- Yeah, but we have still tried our best and that one boy got one free kick and everything.

- It has been a disaster!

- We should buy the little boy some candy or something. (Totally uninterested about the score) I got to go to the ladies room. (She leaves)

- But it is almost half time. Actually, just go and I’ll meet you after. (Bit relieved)

(Long after the interval)

- Did I miss anything, I was talking to Mindy? By the way, I think them two there in the second row are back together.

- It’s been great, we just scored and tactically really on top of the game.

- Yeah, I’m so happy (She smiles to the little boy with a scarf as well)

- What time the game finishes. (She asks after quietly doing her fingernails for a long time)

- Around five as always.

- But do we have to watch the whole game again?

- What! It is bad enough that I can’t go for pre-game pint anymore and always have to rush for the start. Didn’t we agree after all the fights that my only compromise can be that on Mondays I’m not allowed to watch football? We will never ever leave a game before it finishes.

- You and your football. (She sulks away and looks for sympathy from other women on the stands. There isn’t many. From the ones there, some are really into the game, some constantly trying just to mirror their boyfriends to please them and some don’t care and read a book or something. She relates to the last category)

- Why you even bother coming to the games because you don’t like it? (After seeing she is playing angry with him)

- I do like coming. I like the atmosphere and the feeling…

- But you don’t get the game. And I love my football.

- Alright, I've not one of those girls who like and follow sports, I've always been more into music. So maybe I don't understand it but at least I've made an effort to be with you, part of your hobby. Anyways, why do I always have to come as second?

- I don’t really enjoy coming with you. I can’t go to the pre-game drink, swear, even follow the game properly with you. We always just end up fighting. Why… (Palace scores in the middle of the sentence. The stadium is heaving and also they start hugging each other really happily forgetting the argument)

(Happy end to the game)

- What a great game! (She is so happy. Not because she really cares how important the win was for the league table but she knows well how much of a difference winning will mean to next few days at home. And for the little boy. She is, though, secretly bit sad for the small player who was tackled from the losing team)

- Yeah, what a great day! Sorry I was bit tense before. (After all, he knows that some women are there for different reasons than he is. Her reason is him and that is as good reason to come to football as any other)

- That’s ok. I also really enjoyed that the left backs positioning gave freedom to the winger to commit but still kept our back four narrow enough.

- My girl! (He is amazed and proud about her great view)

- So why did the cookie jar wanted to go offside of the brown sauce?





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